Most important 20 minutes of your day ... Read with your child

• Posted by Worcester News October 12, 2022 - Filed in News - #John Monfredo  - 1,304 views

  The Most Important 20 Minutes of Your Day... Read With Your Child

  By John Monfredo

  

  AS WE EMERGE FROM THE PANDEMIC, LET’S PUT THE EMPHASIS ON KINDNESS

  As schools return from two years of dealing with the pandemic many educators have been concerned about the mental breakdown of students, student insecurity that several students are experiencing and the need for assisting those students.

  Let’s look at this all-important issue and see what can be done.  One suggestion to consider across the district is having a program and a philosophy of encouraging acts of kindness in each school.   Not only to have this idea as an overall philosophy but have something tangible that students can see, feel, and touch.  Yes, I do agree that adding guidance will help, but perhaps the guidance personnel along with the staff members can lead the way for an effective change.

  Over five years ago, as a school committee member, I suggested that all schools consider the “Buddy Bench” concept.  The idea came about from the Lester Holt show on “Inspiring America Series” seen on NBC.  The story featured a 9-year-old girl who was striving to change the world one child at a time.  After witnessing a fellow student alone and seemingly without a friend, she thought a lot about how that would feel and decided that she could not ignore it and needed to do something about it!

  Proclaiming, “Everyone deserves a friend.” She worked with her teacher to create The Buddy Bench.  They placed a beautiful shiny, bright blue park bench on the playground.  What was significant about the bench was the slogan, “A friend is only a seat a way”, which was cut out or stamped out on the bench at the top of its backrest.  The idea behind this concept was that the bench would become a tool to help bring students together and to have them included so if anyone ever felt alone or not included, they were encouraged to sit on the bench.

  After hearing that story in April of 2017, I filed an agenda item requesting that our elementary schools consider such a project.   To my surprise the group that picked up the idea were students at WSU in the Enactus program.   It’s a program that believes students could make an impact in their community.    Thus, the Enactus program had the Buddy Bench as one of its projects and helped several schools in the district to establish the program.   Some of the schools in Worcester did embrace the project and had it at their schools.  However, since the pandemic not many schools continued with the concept and as an educator, a former principal, I know if you don’t encourage it doesn’t take place.

  Thus, I’m advocating that the schools implement the idea but have it as part of the overall strategy on “Kindness” in their schools.  Part of the program should include a school message entitled, “Kindness Matters in our School.”

  Schools, first, need to BELIEVE in this philosophy, and have staff and parents establish rules and expectations for the school.  Setting up rules will help create a positive school climate and assist those children in need.  Teachers would have to explain to students why kindness matters which will lead to a positive school climate.

  As a former principal, I know that teachers play a major role in setting the tone in the classroom.  Thus, showing kindness and being respectful to the students sets the example by modeling.  This includes being thoughtful in your interactions and avoiding speaking negatively as well as showing compassion when students are going through tough times. Staff need to start the day off by greeting the children with a smile and by listening to their concerns.  This goes a long way in establishing a positive environment.

   In addition, emphasizing the positive and calling parents with good news goes a long way in establishing that all important positive climate.  The school, from the principal to the staff, could start by making positive telephone calls or sending positive messages to the homes weekly. Also, a bulletin board within the school and posters in the classroom can serve to motivate students.  In addition, how about listing the kind acts that have been done by the children. Remember some children often don’t understand what it means to be kind.  Therefore, teaching them kindness is so important. Children who are kind will not only be kind to others, but also to themselves.

  Returning to the Buddy Bench, continue to emphasize the importance of the symbol and talk about it often.  I would also have a special day to celebrate kindness and talk about what one can do within the school and within the community.  This concept could lead to making friends with others for when students have friends, they are more likely to want to come to school each day and show kindness to one another.

  Another part of the teaching is to consider the importance of teaching inclusiveness… It's all about the importance of making everyone feel valued regardless of differences.

  Teaching inclusiveness helps students learn to value and respect others, which is a key component of being kind. One can discuss the different cultures of others and how everyone is special in their own way.

  Finally, involve parents in the program and have parents talk to their children about the importance of kindness. This will reinforce the kindness message if we can involve parents in the process.  You can also have a KIND KIDS badge for students who go above and beyond in helping others.

  These are just a few ideas schools need to consider but teaching kindness and using the Buddy Bench concept is a start.  It will assist students in feeling good about themselves and help them spread this important concept to others.  We are still in the current social situation of coping with the pandemic and kindness could be a part of the healing process

  As the world renowned Maya Angelou stated,  “ I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

  Schools let’s do it! I’d love to hear from educators and parents about this concept. Contact me at monfredoj@gmail.com